Thank you to all who have commented with their advice. I am felling somewhat better now. : )
But I think this blogging thing is good, so I’m gonna keep doing it.
Kymlee suggested I figure out what I don’t want in a relationship. I think this is very good advice. So I have been thinking about it, and this is what I have decided.
I don’t want:
to be used
to be abused
to be ignored
to be taken advantage of
to be the only one making an effort
for me to be so attached that I don’t have my own life
to feel guilty if I decide to go out with a friend and leave him at home
to be the only one who can support us if we decide to live together without the help of my parents
Hmm.. I think that is a good start. I will think on this some more and add more if I think of any.
-Angel
Pretty good list. Though no one would want any of those. Consider expanding it towards more specific stuff
If I may be so bold, from the brief information you’ve provided thusfar it sounds like you’re in a bit of turmoil. I fully admit I may be totally incorrect here, but just giving you my perspective. It sounds to me like there’s a part of you that’s not happy, that maybe this guy isn’t for you. Your instinct, your gut-feeling is telling you to move on, but your mind needs a bullet list that makes sense of what your gut is telling you. Or a hope that a list of things will convince your instinct it’s wrong. Turmoil. I’ve been there a few times.
Having had the opportunity to look back on those moments in my life and judge the end result, I have always come to the conclusion — “I should have went with my gut instinct.” Many times that meant taking the tougher road, but it was the right route to take. The other route was easier, but also dead-end.
Again, I’m could be completely wrong, and if I’ve crossed a line, my apologies. Just give your instinct it’s fair share in the equation.
I’m happy that you took my advice hun, and more importantly I’m glad that you’re open to listening to others because we’ve been there, we’ve made our mistakes, and you will make yours. Sometimes that’s just they way people learn. Like Hangerbaby said, you want to make your list specific as well as general. So this is a good list. And as time goes by you will add things to your list, and you might even take somethings off, meaning, they won’t feel as much as a priority to you, which isn’t always necessarily bad.
The single. most. important. thing. is that you have to stay true to yourself. Understand yourself, and do not compromise for what will damage you. Protect yourself. You will be conflicted sometimes, but Antonio was right, your gut instinct will be right, and sometimes your gut is telling you things your afraid of doing, such as leaving a dangerous relationship, or having a conversation bout something you don’t want to talk about. If you can do anything, it’s trust yourself, but don’t sabotage yourself either. Live, LEARN, and love and trust me, you’ll be fine.
Good post, I hope you continue