with Nichole and an old friend named Griffin, and we discussed my relationship problems. I really wasn’t planning on it because I really don’t like telling them about it (probably because I know what I need to do I just don’t want to) but some how we got on that subject. And we all came to the conclusion that the situation and relationship I am in is not so great. So I am going to break up with him. And I don’t think it would be good for me to wait until July because then I might change my mind. But I don’t want to break up with him before my birthday which is next month because I don’t want to be all sad on my birthday.
I have a confession to make. I am not yet 21, I actually turn 21 next month. February 11.
I really don’t want to kick him out. I don’t want to abandon him. But I can’t be taking care of him, he’s got to be able to take care of himself. And I want to experience the whole dating thing. I’ve had Jordan since my Junior year of high school, so I kind of missed out on that.
I talked to my mom about this, so we are trying to figure out what to do.
I just can not forget why I am breaking up with him. I don’t want to lose my bravery. Right now I know what I need to do and I am no longer denying it. He’s crazy and a little bit immature, I can not be a 21 year old taking care of a 23 year old. I do not enjoy sex with him. When we are in bed I just want to get it over with. I mean sure, all of this bad stuff came with a good person but I just have to remember that I am not in a good situation and I have to be brave and get out of it.
I know I am afraid of being alone but I have to believe that I will find someone eventually and I don’t need to rush it.
I already have a plan for when I break up with him. I will tell him, “Jordan, I care for you but I can not take care of you anymore. You have to be able to take care of yourself before you can really have a good relationship, and you can’t do that. So I want us to see other people. That doesn’t mean I want to completely quit seeing you. I would like to keep going on dates with you, but I want to date other people and maybe when you can really take care of yourself things between you and me can be different and less stressful.”
Then I will see other people. And I do not want to get attached or have a boyfriend for like… a year. So I came up with some rules for myself. I will go on dates. And I can not see one guy more than once a week. That way I will not get easily attached to one guy. I am afraid of easily getting attached because I know I am afraid of being alone. And I don’t want to get obsessive. I will hang out with my friends a lot, and concentrate on school.
So that is my plan. Now I just have to remember my plan and why I am doing this and I have to figure out how to get Jordan out of my house. Where will he go? I don’t know. I do not want to destroy his progress. He has finally kept a job for a year and is getting better with communication. If I break up with him I don’t want him to lose that. I’m afraid he will just shut down or go crazy or something. I wish there was someone out there who was rich and wouldn’t mind just taking him for me.
Ththth-Th-Tha-That’s all folks.
-Angel 
Wow, you sound just like me and my boyfriend! We’ve been in a serous relationship since my senior year of high school, and he still lives in his parents basement :/
My advice to you is not to postpone the breakup. That will give you time to heal before your birthday. Do you want to spend your birthday knowing you’ll have to break up with Jordan? And if he gets you something nice, you’ll feel even worse. Hell, instead of dating a guy a week right away, why not give yourself a man-break? Take some time for you. Then once you feel ready, play the game for a while
Good luck!
Yea, I really shouldn’t postpone it. But I’ve been discussing the whole thing with my mom and she is going to try to find someway to get him help. Neither of us want to just abandon him, and it would be really weird if I broke up with him and he was still living at my house. But I’m not worried about him getting me anything really nice for my birthday or Valentine’s Day, because he has no money and I really don’t think he’ll get me really anything at all.
I definitely will need a man break. I didn’t mean I’d start implementing that plan right away, just once I start dating again I can not see a guy more than once a week, because I don’t want to get attached easily.